The dream I chase and what IT means to me (23/07/25)

Hello!

...!
Ahh! Jeez! You scared me!

Well, sucks to suck! I'm here in an oddly thematic way! (And that's robably because I'm the one writing this!)

*Sigh* Yeah. So can you get started with whatever you're gonna go off about?

That's incredibly rude, hypothetical audience that I'm shadowboxing, but FINE! If you insist. Several years ago (probably like 2023?), I had this one dream that I still can't get out of my head

It's that one about the cutouts, no?

Yeah, exactly! The one where I was plopped into a giant college/uni campus building! With really high white ceilings and no visible light fixtues! (Yet it was still fully illuminated) I was aimlessly walking around, untill I saw a dark rectangle on one of the walls.

And I heard something telling me to go and explore off the beaten path. I was constantly bumping into old acquiantances that were heading the opposite way.

And then... there was a big, dim hallway, wasn't there?

That's right! With several, several doors on its walls. I kept walking, and walking, and walking. Until I stopped at a door. WIthout any hesitation, I turned the rusty knob and opened it... Or maybe it opened on it's own?

Either way, what did you find in there?

A theater play. But with cutouts as the characters and as the stage... I can no longer recall their faces (even though I remember they were seveeral anthropomorphic animals), but the story they told and acted out still follows me (As evidenced by this post!)

They noticed my presence, hopping around as best as they could to face me.

But they said nothing, they were cutouts, obviously. And cutouts don't speak!

But.

But... I understood what they "said." They "talked" about community, joy, meetings, partings, reuinions, sorrow. How they'll be a part of them all.

I still remember my situation when this happened. I was just recenetly diagnosed as autistic, I felt both relieved and scared, naturally I think.

"Finally! I finally know why I behaved like I did!"
"I know why I 'learned' to mask!"
"But... How can I take it off? In front of Who can I take it off?"

Hey! Those were my lines! (They still are, but you're just saying them before me!)

Well, regardless of who said them, I felt... Happy? When I entered. I felt like myself? Even though I was in a performance.

And, well. Those things did happen. (Not in the order I laid them out though) I told some of my friends, and...

Did they treat you differently? Did they laugh at you and kick you down?

No. Not at all.

They were there for me. Hell, they still are! They don't just listen to me yap about somehting I like, but they actively tell me: "Go off! Say more! Tell me all about it even though I know nothing about it!!"

Side note: I would genuinely take a bullet for them. I'm fully serious.

Ok, ok. I'm guessing that you woke up?

Duh! How else would I be writing this? I remember immediately writing it down somewhere that I can't find anymore. I had a big idea for a new story to write! Y'know, "The Cutout Quartet!"

It was about a highschooler finding solace in an eerie classroom... that then turned into a giant, flashy theather! But, it couldn't last forever, just like a dream, where you have to wake up.

There was probably some other now-lost things I wrote down, but I've never stopped chasing that dream and what they "said."

I mean, every part came true! I went through these things with them by my side.

Wow... That's...

Yeah.

I don't really know how else to end this post, other than thanking you for reading. Until next time!

- Leo